Still working on Oregon/FreedomWorks part ii.
But his clothes are clean.
Meantime (and I mean “MEAN”):
Parable the First:
The Republicans drove the bus into the ditch. Then, they refused to help us pull the bus OUT of the ditch. Now, they want us to vote for them because they’re wearing clean clothes.
Parable the Second:
I had a letter in the local newspaper on the day that the death count reached 1,000. This originally appeared in the Eugene (Ore.) Register-Guard, as noted:
Letters in the Editor’s Mailbag
A parable of pre-emptive war
My neighbor is a real creep. About 10 years ago, he got in a lot of trouble, and he’s been on probation. I heard that he was going to buy an assault rifle, and I told his parole officers, but they didn’t do anything.
I think the guy could be a deadly threat to my family, so my friends and I decided to take over his house. When we busted down his door, we sprayed his bedroom with gunfire, hoping to kill him, but I guess he wasn’t there.
We found him hiding in the cellar and we put him under citizen’s arrest. We found his two sons, and we shot them. They are bad, just like him. When we searched the house, we couldn’t find any assault weapons, although we found an old bullet. Still, we’re pretty sure he hid the guns at a neighbor’s place.
It doesn’t really matter that there weren’t any guns. Everybody knows he was a bad guy, and his sons were just as bad as him, so nobody’s crying about them.
The only problem is that the other people who were living in the house don’t like us being there, and have asked us to leave. We appointed a guy we know to be the house manager and he wants us to stay, so we’re staying.
It’s just that the police tell me I’ve broken the law. That’s crazy. The guy was bad, and his sons didn’t deserve to live.
Vigilante? Me? No way.
The Register-Guard, Eugene, Oregon
September 8, 2004
Update: SPECIAL BONUS PARABLE!!
Is there such a thing as crocodile gasps-of-disbelief? It ought to be filed next to, or in the same folder as ‘high moral dudgeon.’
Noel Sheppard / NewsBusters.org:
Bill Maher Calls Republicans ‘A Deadly Enemy’ — After telling his audience that his job isn’t to “carry water for this or any administration,” Bill Maher on Friday closed his show with a campaign speech begging viewers to support Democrats in the upcoming midterm elections.
UNREAL! Bill Maher Calls Republicans “A Deadly Enemy”
Robert Stacy McCain / The Other McCain:
America: Let’s Make Bill Maher Cry!
Cato Uticensis / American Conservative Values:
Bill Maher Calls GOP ‘A Deadly Enemy’
Well, if the jackboot fits …
(Happily, Newsbusters — ‘Exposing & Combating Liberal Media Bias Since 2005′ – has the complete (if somewhat inaccurate) transcript of Maher’s on–air editorial.)
Noel Sheppard of Newsbusters