Fat Huck Agin

I don’t have anything against being fat. That’s up to you, and up to me, and if you are happy with yourself, so be it. There are issues, but they’re finally YOUR responsibility.

Mike Huckabee’s 2006 national launch

But, when you LAUNCH your national presence (and eventually your presidential run) on how you lost 110 pounds, cured your diabetes and how EVERYBODY ought to follow your success and how your being a fat slob was now your crusade to cure all fat slobs, reality OUGHT to bite you in the (lard)ass when that BS goes away.

So, Huckolas Huckabee was on Jay Leno last night seated next to the svelte Jack Black (I am lying for comedic effect).

And HOW did Mr. “Weight Loss Crusader” happen to look?

Fat Huck on Jay Leno Thursday night

So where is all the blubbering (pun intended) about saving your life by sensible weight loss? I guess it must’ve got lost in all his pontificating about “civility” and how “toxic” the political environment is, what with all the lying and posturing out there.

Which is why the porcine hypocrite says he’s not running.

Gee. I thought it was because the best he can manage is a waddle.

I get so damned tired of moralizing, pontificating holier-than-thou types who blissfully offer themselves a pass when THEY transgress and commit the sins they are out there inveighing against.

Make no mistake, friends, this is just as vile as Limbaugh’s rationalizations about his “Hillbilly heroin” addiction, which he successfully spun into “prescription drug dependency.”  And, of course, Huckabee has a three-figure radio station syndicated show (for six or seven figures). And his Faux Nooz Sunday show, where he welcomes haters like Nugent to sing his songs of juvenile pornography.*

(* A pocket-full of wry.)

I guess Huckabee self-medicates with pie.

Hack sheep, hack sheep, pulled you any wool?

Yes sir, yes sir, bank account’s full.

Which is WHY Huck is out there promoting his non-candidacy.

And explaining why he’s not “running.”

Time to eat a LOT of crow, Huckolas.

And remember, crow is a great source of lean protein.

Courage.

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2 Comments

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2 responses to “Fat Huck Agin

  1. Wild Bill

    The jokes would be never ending if that joke were to run, oh wait, he is running, his mouth, non stop stupidity.

    Great post Hart, and remember, posture makes perfect (alignment)