Seriously, is this a Vice Presidential Debate.
or a private online video chat session?
You Betcha. Yup.
Mooselini Reveres History. Her way.
She not only refutedewsquedated Chris Wallace’s question, but came to the defense of her many addle-pated historioghraphers. Seriously. You can’t make this shit up. See for yourself:
click to watch on YouTube
(but grab it quick Faux’ll Cease and Desist it out of beingness soon)
And the ideologically-friendly Foster-Friess-financed Daily Caller transcribes it for us [names changed to shield the innocent, i.e. YOU, dear reader]:
On this weekend’s “Fox News Sunday,” the former Moosylvanian Ruler took on her critics, including one of her Fox News colleagues, Shephard Smith, who had said Princess was on a publicity tour. The shot came after host Chris Wallace asked the Moosylvanian Potentate what she was up to on her bus tour.
“Oh man, it seems like I have answered this question a million times in the last week,” Princess said. “And folks still, I guess aren’t understanding it. At least reporters don’t seem to understand it. Even your own Shep Smith there on Fox News – he announced the other day I was on some publicity tour. I wanted to say, Shep, take it one step further. What am I publicizing on tour? I’m publicizing Americana and our foundation and how important is it we learn about our past and our challenges and victories throughout American history so that we can successfully proceed forward very heady days, rough waters ahead of us, Chris. We need to make sure we have a strong grasp of our foundational victory to move forward. That’s what we are highlighting on the bus tour.”
However, in the midst her bus tour, a video posted on Think Progress last week suggested Princess didn’t know her American history. That wasn’t the case according Princess.
“You know what, I didn’t mess up about Paul Revere,” she said. “Here’s what Paul Revere did. He warned the Americans that ‘the British were coming, the British were coming’ and they were going to try to take our arms. We got to make sure that we were protecting ourselves and shoring up all of our ammunitions and our fire arms so they couldn’t take it.”
Faux Nooz: Moosylvanian Princess’ Historical Revere-tionism?
But in addition to that, Princess insists Paul Revere was warning the British not to take American arms because they wouldn’t succeed.
“But remember, that the British had already been there,” Princess said. “Many soldiers for seven years in that area. And part of Paul Revere’s ride — and it wasn’t just one ride — he was a courier, he was a messenger. Part of his ride was to warn British that were already there. That, ‘Hey, you are not going to succeed. You are not going to take American arms. You are not going to beat our own well-armed persons, individual, private militia that we have.’ He did warn the British. And in a shout out, gotcha question that was asked of me, I answered candidly. And I know my American history.”
‘Candidly‘ it ought be pointed out, is in no wise a negation of words such as ‘stupidly,’ ‘awkwardly,’ ‘malapropishly,’ or even ‘cluelessly.’
And, if that were not enough, this blogger reports (with links to a hilarious Wikipedia discussion and the equally boffo A Humble Suggestion for Moosylvanian Princess Fans):
Now they’re trying like crazy to edit the Wikipedia page for “Paul Revere” to make it match Princess’s botched version of history. Here’s the Revision history of Paul Revere; check out the edits that are being reversed.
Yes. If the facts don’t fit the beliefs, squish the “facts” to match.
This is the kind of historical revisionism that infests all of human history, but, sadly, is seldom this blatant or petty outside of your Great Aunt Mabel’s new memories of how “we always knew that Uncle Bob was a homosexual,” complete with brand new recollections of things that never happened.
Great Aunt Mabel doesn’t try to hack Wikipedia with it.
I said it throughout the Bush Administration, and I’ll reiterate it here: the single classic mistake of every dictator that ever toppled, or king who lost a kingdom is to lock ones’ self into an information bubble that will tolerate no deviance from the dream of success, rather than monitoring the real world for actual knowledge.
Which is how we can’t understand how the guys who were fighting for us this week in Afghanistan are fighting against us next week. Or, how we invaded and occupied a Middle Eastern nation in 2003 on borrowed funds, and, even though we’re broke, we still have a hundred thousand personnel there, including troops.
And how it was that Paul Revere, hearing the backwards echo of the Princess of Moosylvania suddenly stopped in his tracks, wheeled in the saddle, and sped towards British lines, ringing church bells and shooting off firearms to warn:
The Colonists are Coming!
The Colonists are coming!
(And they’ve got their Second Amendment rights!)
That was a couple of years after Revere’s famous engraving of the Boston Massacre, where Crispus Attucks, the first Black Hero of the Revolutionary War — slew a dozen British soldiers on the Boston Commons, and was famously gotten off by John Adams, who said, “Facts are malleable things.”