Fort Apache, The Outer Solar System

A typical Daily Caller “journalistic” coup

Foster Friess is running for Governor of Wyoming, and one of his little cash startups is running off at the mouth.  Why? Because the revelation of payments to Michael Cohen by Stormy Daniels’ attorney, Michael Avenotti, last night, is, evidently, a Benghazi-Level Mendacity Event:

Avenatti Accuses The Wrong Michael Cohens Of Making ‘Fraudulent’ Payments
Chuck Ross / The Daily Caller

Michael Avenatti, porn star Stormy Daniels’ lawyer, released a seven-page dossier on Tuesday containing a list of payments purportedly made to Michael Cohen, the lawyer for President Donald Trump.  But there is one problem with the document: two of the allegedly “fraudulent” payments were made to men named Michael Cohen who have no affiliation with Trump….

Yeah. Two payments to wrong Michael Cohens totaling … slightly over $5000. Look at this Memeorandum screen capture and note that the Rightie Blog Swarm I’m about to describe is ALL OVER that $5,230 (1) while the NEXT story has Novartis ADMITTING paying the RIGHT Michael Cohen over $1 million (2). Let’s do a little math, shall we?

Novartis admits to paying Michael Cohen (the correct Cohen) $100K per month for one year. That’s $1.2 million. Dividing $5280 by $1.2 million we come up with 0.00435833 or 0.436 percent. Which means that Michael Avenatti was 0.436 percent wrong, or, 99.99564167 percent RIGHT.*

[* if we counted ONLY the Novartis case and ignored the OTHER $4 million involved.]

In Encyclopedias of the Future, this will be the illustrative example for the phrase “can’t see the forest for the trees.”

Yes, one might characterize it as a desperate form of GOPaganda, or the endless wishful thinking of needing to be always correct.

But note that I’m being generous. I haven’t mentioned the OTHER $4 million that Mr. Cohen is alleged to have received via his Delaware shell corporation. That calculation would require so many “9”s that I’d undoubtedly run out of pixels.

Each and every blog contained therein quote The Daily Caller or Haaretz (who broke the INCREDIBLE $960 story but are behind a paywall, so we cannot admire the perspicacity of their undoubtedly protean journalism) to mountainize the molehill — not so much through their reporting of the two payments of $980 and $4250 but through their HEADLINES doing the heavy lifting, as you’ll notice:

Victor Morton / Washington Times:   Michael Avenatti’s document reportedly details ‘suspicious payments’ to wrong Michael Cohens
Chaim Levinson / Haaretz:   Israelis named by Stormy Daniels’ attorney for transferring hush money to Michael Cohen: ‘Is this a prank?’
Frieda Powers / Conservative News Today:   Stormy Daniels’ lawyer challenges Rudy Giuliani to a throwdown. Boy, did he hit a nerve.
Sarah D. / twitchy.com:   ‘Expensive INCOMPETENCE’! Looks like Michael Avenatti made another YUGE Michael Cohen mistake
The Right Scoop:   OOPS! Michael Avennati targeted the wrong Michael Cohens in his dossier!
Daily Caller / The Political Insider:   Report: Avenatti Accuses The Wrong Michael Cohen Of Making ‘Fraudulent’ Payment
Ryan Saavedra / Daily Wire:   BOMBSHELL MISTAKE: Stormy Daniels’ Lawyer Screws Up Accusations Against Michael Cohen, Report Says

You have to admire the Goebbels-esque coinage “BOMBSHELL MISTAKE: Stormy Daniels’ Lawyer Screws Up Accusations Against Michael Cohen, Report Says” — although probably NOT the Rube Goldberg sentence construction.

Or “‘Expensive INCOMPETENCE’! Looks like Michael Avenatti made another YUGE Michael Cohen mistake.

I guess $5280 constitutes a “YUGE”?

I suppose this will comfort all the millions of Thousandaires out there.

Who are, parenthetically, supporting the propaganda networks of the Foster Friesses of this world.

The Delaware Hedge Fund manager who retired to 
“millionaire acres” in Jackson Hole, Wyoming,
and plays cowboy on his blog: Foster Friess

This is what the right wing political cult foists off on the American public, each and every day.

Insult to injury? The Daily Caller quotes ITSELF in the Daily Caller / The Political Insider report from “The Daily Caller Foundation,” which means that as a “charity” it is offsetting some millionaire’s taxes as a “charitable” contribution, making us, We, the People, the subsidizers of their propaganda and persiflage.

America. Long may it rave.

Courage.

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